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Life in you

Companion

 

Pieces of hair fly across her face

While the sharp wind plays with her

Thin smile

Then slowly with all the innocence

I know of

She looks right into my eyes

Dark and deep

Pure and honest

Creases in the skin right above her

Cheeks point towards the sky

 

Bent inwards her skin tells stories of the trails

The sobs throughout the years

The things she has seen have left scars in her eyes

I can tell by the way she looks at strangers and the way her hands bend when

She shakes hands

I know she has seen some beautifully

Horrible things

 

When we go to parties or visit the city

I keep my focus on the way she views the creations in sight

The shapes of the shoes the cracks in the road

While noticing every detail, she thinks deeply as she passes her

Glances over the long horizon

In the car she looks out the window while telling

A story with the way her neck bends which moves her head as her faces change

Their position every few half miles

 

At home she flips through magazines on the floor

Looking upon the pictures with questions and with quick flicks

Of the pages she closes it and stares into space as if to take in everything

She has just experienced  

She feels restless while drinking coffee

And has the biggest smiles after drinking a few alcoholic drinks

Her hips sway like the waves in a storm when she hears a song that

Makes her move

 

Her friends confuse her with their simple remarks and failures to want

To see

Deep inside her soul

She keeps her feelings locked up

And judges her past times so bitterly she assumes

She is an unjust type of girl

Who doesn't deserve to enjoy the pleasures everyone else

Does and knows nothing about sweet

Feelings like being pure

For she feels far from

Being untouched in an ugly manner

And words have verbally scared her with their

Sharp edges

The chance was never there for her to be innocent or pure

And for that she

Just for little instances

Hates the world for being so unfair

 

Why is it that she can cry so easily without a reason?

And stare out into space for hours on end,

With people trying to get her attention

And conversations being shared around her

The world moving a mile a minute

And she just sits there looking at nothing

Nothing at all

The dust maybe

Or the way the light is hitting the floor at the opening

Of the door and how when people walk through it

Just for a moment

Their shoes look like they're glowing

 

Why can't she find love when everyone around her can?

Why can't she settle for the ordinary in life?

But chooses to see the deeper meanings behind everything she

Touches smell tastes and most of all feels

As humans interact and manipulate with her senses all the time

The ones that cause stress glue themselves around her

Making her self esteem work harder

 Every day of the week

To break free

 

I watch this young girl travel up and down stairs and in-between

Steps contemplating the use of her life

Its importance and mean

And by the time she's at the bottom she suddenly decides she is at fault

It's called blame and it's the baggage she carries around with her like

A bad tattoo or a scar

It has become such a big part of her life that she might

Feel naked and uncomfortable without its constant embrace

And its whispers

It's all your fault and you could have done more

 

Bullshit and blame sing songs to her inside her head

As she tryst to get through her days of bitter sweet mornings and long

Depressing afternoon and nights

Some days

Her mother tells her things that no one else ever hears

Things of pointless nature and full of bouncing truths

That requires her to dive into the deep mindset of a sad middle aged woman

And try to understand all her problems and disappointments

With the weight on her shoulders and the songs in her head

It's a wonder that she lets anyone else in

Or even try

 

Her friends can be there and speak to her

But she pre-assumes and decides that they don't

Mean the heart filled words they say to her

Those words aren't real

They are self serving and are said without care

She thinks as her friends tell her they are there

For her in all times of need

 

But what she needs is a break to breath

A reality check and a happy face or person

To pay the much needed attention

To my friend

My only companion

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